This project was inspired by a fear response Erica had to a confetti blast during a festival in Amsterdam, summer 2017. Growing up in Lebanon in the early 2000’s meant hearing and seeing news of bombings, shootings, and conflicts often enough to condition her to staying alert, despite the country’s relative safety nowadays. When she moved to Amsterdam in 2016, things she saw reminded her of violent instances she had witnessed, and she felt uneasy – like something was missing – when their brutal consequences did not follow. She became aware of this phenomenon after the confetti blast, although similar moments have happened since. This video is an exploration of the tensions between media imagery on Lebanon, either partying or agonising, their effects on those growing up exposed to such media, as well as Erica’s personal experience with visual or auditory signals that no longer mean what they used to.